i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
