I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
