Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Randomize