Where did you get a picture of my penis
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Randomize
