yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
