Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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