someone get that fucking seahorse.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
my poor anus
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
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