I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
he thought i was a dude.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Randomize
