Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize