he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
