doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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