Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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