Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
