He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
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