I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
im having a threesome with these popsicles
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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