She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Randomize
