Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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