okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I made him laugh his dick is mine
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
