I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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