im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
