does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
the raccoons are back...
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
