im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
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