no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
