Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I pour the whiskey from now on
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
