Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Randomize
