no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
we made out on top of his cat.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
