I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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