I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Randomize
