yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
