I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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