im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
