Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
