Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
