You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I am one with the molecules
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
