i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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