I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
