My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
