I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Randomize
