the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
bring money and cleavage
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Randomize
