I never want to see another naked old woman again.
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
