Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
