so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
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