Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
lol hangovers are for mortals.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
