Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
