i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Randomize
