What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Randomize
