Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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