Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
