Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
and she was petting her beer can
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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