If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
